Guest Grim Reaper Posted October 21, 2003 Report Share Posted October 21, 2003 1. Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas. 2. You need only two tools. WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't moveand it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape.3. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship: "I apologize" and "You are right." 4. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. 5. When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. It's easier to eat humble pie while it's still warm. 6. The only really good advice that your mother ever gave you was, "Go! You might meet somebody!" 7. If he/she says that you are too good for him/her--believe them. 8. Learn to pick your battles; ask yourself, "Will this matter one year from now? How about one month? One week? One day?" 9. Never pass up an opportunity to pee. 10. If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance!11. Living well really is the best revenge. Being miserable because of a bad or former relationship just might mean that the other person was right about you. 12. Work is good, but it's not that important!!! 13. And finally... Be really nice to your friends. You never know when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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