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White House Sex Scandal


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WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Security is tight in front of the White House for a new resident -- a Mallard hen sitting on nine eggs she laid at the foot of a sapling over the weekend.

The mother duck chose for her nest a fresh heap of mulch on the sidewalk outside the heavily guarded entrance of the Treasury Department, next door to the presidential residence.

Secret Service officers have erected metal stanchions around the tree to shield the incubating bird from passersby on the crowded pedestrian plaza in the heart of the U.S. capital.

http://tinyurl.com/3nhxk

Rumor has it that the ducks have lived on the WH grounds for years but

refused to have sex while Clinton was in office...thus no eggs.

According to a recent Dan Blather CBS documentary on Sex in the White House,

including an interview with Daffy Duck, the mallard drake feared Clinton

would go after his mate if he (Bill Clinton) found out which duck was the

female. In an interview with the drake it stated" Cartoons are not real

but Bill Clinton was defintely after my lady".

According to first hand reports from Roger Rabbit and Bugs Bunny, both of

whom were *regulars* and on the WH guest list during the Clinton years,

especially during the annual Easter Egg Rolls, the story reported by Daffy is true.

To confuse things even more NewsMax recently reported that Michael Jackson

has been named in legal documents as the father of the mallard duck eggs and

will be called to testify in a paternal suit now on the docket. The drake

said "quack quack" when asked about the law suit, inferring that Jackson was

indeed guilty.

In response to the story (an exclusive) Jackson claims the accusations are

quackery. He went on to say that Jhe may have had sex with some juvenile

geese or chickens on his NeverLands ranch but never grown ducks, especially mallards.

CNN has reported that the NewsMax story is not true and is nothing more than

an attempt by the mallard drake to extort money from M Jackson.

Jesse Jackson supports CNN's claim and says it is the result of a group of

extremist white swans trying to slander the colorful drake.

BREAKING NEWS...................BREAKING NEWS...............FoxNews reports

that the drake reportedly has a harem of chicks (not ducks) who are in need

of constant attention and money and are trying to extort money from the

drake by reporting his mate layed eggs. The drake is reportedly aging in

years and desperately trying to maintain his status as a Sugar Daddy, but

his duck sperm has grown weak.

Jane Fonda has publically supported the chicks while Jessie Jackson

continues to claim that the colorful Sugar Daddy drake was being used and

abused by the white swans for no other use than to advance their racist political agenda (SWANS or Snow White Anarchists Needing Sex).

Don't believe it? Go to:

www.warnerbrothers.com/DaffyDuckTellsAll/Politics/ClintonTriedToHaveSexWithMe

Hey, I read it on the internet....it has to be true.

Eh? :D

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Re-reading the title here, the person I can least imagine having any sexual proclivities at all is Dubya.

Just imagine the revolting idea of a Clinton/Lewinski situation involving Bush :shocking:

(Edit: I should have qualified the "Bush" part of that by stating "George" Bush.)

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Re-reading the title here, the person I can least imagine having any sexual proclivities at all is Dubya.

Just imagine the revolting idea of a Clinton/Lewinski situation involving Bush :shocking:

Bush doesn't smoke cigars.

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Re-reading the title here, the person I can least imagine having any sexual proclivities at all is Dubya.

Just imagine the revolting idea of a Clinton/Lewinski situation involving Bush :shocking:

Bush doesn't smoke cigars.

Monica does :D

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Re-reading the title here, the person I can least imagine having any sexual proclivities at all is Dubya.

Just imagine the revolting idea of a Clinton/Lewinski situation involving Bush :shocking:

Bush doesn't smoke cigars.

Monica does :D

Does she inhale?

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