Chrismas Quiz

[catgate]

With the ever looming presence of the festering season herewith a timely quiz.

Christmas Quiz

Answer True or False

1. All the following are hormones:- testosterone, toblerone, trombone.?

2. Alexander the Great conquered all before him and went as far as Northern India before settling down as man of Culture. He was a gifted musician and loved nothing better than the classical Indian Rag (pronounced with a long 'a' as in 'argue'). This complex music is invariably played on the sitar, with tabla accompaniment. He was quite well versed in literature, and was also known as an excellent cook. He was the first person to have incorporated the herb thyme into food. Up until then sage, coriander and cummin seeds were used almost exclusively. So delighted was he, with this new herb, that he composed a rag in praise of it. It was played widely during his lifetime but a couple of centuries after his death it was outlawed as being an inappropriate subject for such ethereal music. This is the tune that then became known as Alexander's Banned Thyme Rag.?

3. Plutonium is less radioactive than euphonium.?

4. The Barber of Seville is famous for his mother's marmalade.?

5. Mervin Stribblthrangler was the inventer of the first Executive Cornish Pasty. He was also the inventor of Executive Gravy and Executive Indigestion followed by Executive Rennies.?

6. There have never been bluebirds over the white cliffs of Dover neither before nor since Vera Lynn. The nearest thing was a nest of bluetits in the garden of a Mrs. Posstlethwaite of Folkstone.?

7. Vera Lynn has never been over the white cliffs of Dover.?

8. Gibletz is a place in Turkey.?

9. Cleanliness is next to Inverness.?

10. St. Francis was a cissy.?

11. Judas's carrot was fed to Mary's donkey.?

12. Turkeys are heathens because they do not look forward to celebrating Christmas.?

13. If all the trees were bread and cheese

And all the seas were ink

And all the ground for miles around

Began to slowly sink

We wouldn't care, we'd breath in air

And get poisoned by some new hazardous material discovered by some weird American scientist who can not talk properly (and yet does it incesantly and boringly, using meaningless words and phrases) and who's name is probably "Ed" or "Herb" or "Chuck".?

14. Father Christmas always wears red so that his nose does not look conspicuous.?

15. The white fur on Father Christmas's outfit is from animals that died naturally of old age.?

16. The reason Father Christmas does not get any older is due to the fact that by virtue of living at the north pole he is able to put out his hand, grasp the pole and walk round it backwards. In this way 326 reverse revolutions takes one year off his age, and he can do this whenever he wants.?

17. The first television cabinet was made by a small boy called Leonard Crabthorpe during the Christmas holidays of 1834, using his Junior Carpenters Set, brought for him by Santa, and a couple of old orange boxes stolen from the local supermarket. Unfortunately he hadn't the slightest idea what to do with it.?

* Award yourself several points for a correct answer

and not as many for a wrong answer. Scores over a certain amount should be double checked by someone from the local Christmas Counselling Service.

[don't ask]

:lol: Enjoyed that Quiz immensely :lol: I think I may have got them all right :lol:

edited spelling - guess which word?

[andsome]

BRILLIANT. This one (9. Cleanliness is next to Inverness.?), reminds me of a holiday in a small village in Greece called GANARDI. The villagers were very proud of the village and everything was spotless. To encourage the tourists to keep everything that way they had put signs up all round the village. Unfortunately the spelling was not quite right, and 'Cleanliness is next to Godliness', came out as 'Cleanlines is next to Godlines'.

[Thos]

:roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao:

Brilliant.

Spike Milligan rides again!

Thos.

[r4may]

Great Amusing Quiz. :P :P :P

[dadyassa]

Very good :lol:

[pwp]

you should get a certificate or be certified not sure which :P