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Marital Guidance


AlanHo
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My wife went shopping with her sister today and returned home triumphant - she had bought a summer coat at a bargain price - a 50% discount.  It had been reduced from frightfully expensive to barely affordable.

 

She couldn't wait to show me her latest purchase - one of many for her river cruise wardrobe in August.

 

I didn't like it - dunno why - but I just didn't like it.

 

So she paraded through the lounge saying "it's lovely isn't it - just what I've been looking for.  You do like it don't you"

 

I have learned from years of experience that there is no point in being negative and hinting that you are "not sure" or even worse "I don't really like it". This will provoke a question and answer session you are bound to lose ending up with her saying "Well. I like it and it's me that's gotta wear it - so there, You'll have to put up with it"

 

Today I faced the same dilemma but decided on a truly risky strategy. I said "it's a nice colour but have you looked at yourself in the full length mirror in the bedroom- I'm no expert but it seems to be cut wrong. Don't you think it makes you look rather tubby. The mirrors in clothes shops are deliberately set up to make you women look thinner than you really are"

 

Long story made short. She's taking it back on Monday.

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The lighting doesn't help either, many years ago I purchased from the Boots emporium a hot water bottle with nice sober blue insulated lining, a colour anodyne and dull as any self respecting Midlands male of middle age will tell you the only possible suitable colour. Get it home take it out of the bag and in real light the damned thing was Lilac. 

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