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Scouse Christmas


Chris
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To the tune of Mistletoe and Wine:

DREAMING OF A SCOUSE CHRISTMAS...

Christmas time, drunkenness and crime,

Children playing - in filth and grime,

With cars on fire - and trainees under tree

Time to rejoice - in be-ing scally,

It's a time for stealing, a time for receiving,

Knock-off gear - worra great feelin

Why pay top dollar - yer can nick it for free,

Just like our lecky, - gas and TV

Christmas time, píssups all the time

Nicking ciggies, - spirits and wine

Wearing-shell-suits and Nykees - all knocked off gear

It's great getting píssed - on someone else's beer

Its a time for drinkin - six packs of Stella

Dat yer got - from some dodgy Fella

Christmas is sound - Christmas is best

God bless our Cilla - and the DHSS

Christmas time - time to joy-ride

Then go and visit - family inside

With Dad on a six stretch - and sis up the duff

This 'City of Culcher' can get pretty rough

So next time your driving - through Liverpool-city

You may just know why - the streets look so shítty

So keep a sharp eye out - for those dodgy deals

But don't drive too slow - or they'll pinch all four wheels

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