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Hb_Kai
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...which was made from velcro and could stick to anything. Inside were a deputation from Mars who were trying to sell their new confection called "Cheese Miner's Choco-sherbert Dip Plus". The old Cheese Miner's Choco-sherbert Dip had been enormously enhanced by adding "Plus" to its name and increasing the price by 25%.and Nestle were threatening to start their own cheese mine using knitted tripe conveyor belts unless...

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and they could get planning permission for their thousand acre badminton complex that they wanted to build on the Brownsea Island nature reserve. Fortunately for them they'd received advice from Donald Trump who advised them that with the government being so lacking in morals, greedy and skint, they'd be able to hurdle all obstacles for as little as ..........

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..providing it was paid directly into the Benevolent Fund for nonsmoking,TT, vegan, lesbian, greenpeace, eco single parent, childless families, along with a signed organ donors card and a copy of the Radio Times. Sadly, due to the large numbers of these largess seekers who had gone to Browsea Island to protest, the Island had sunk completely and was now 2ft 6in below sea level and thus the finding of Baden Powells....

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....a small company in Barnsley called DFS who had just brought out a steam driven knitted tripe sofa, with added horsehair, which had knocked the bottom out of the "buy now pay later" market for duty free, offal and udder technology products. It was laser guided and had a range of four blocks in a built up area.....

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It was the brainchild of Ernest Holdroyd (with a d.....Huddersfield clan) who was a pioneer in many fields. He was the first man to blaze a trail across the wilds of the car park, behind the Ferret and Parsnip, to the back door of Precilla Hemmingway, a big girl with firm grip on the situation.

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Poor Ernest was quite misunderstood, due, in part, to his habit of bounding, in one leap, into the wickerwork saddle on his bespoke asbestos camel, which was squilled with withie underpinnings on all three legs, and rampaging off, shouting, "Follicles" at the top of his voice. His voice carried for miles, and was often used to carry some of the local OAPs down to Bingo, at the Sunshine Social Club and Crematorium, each Wednesday afternoon.

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