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How old is grandpa


AlanHo
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How old is Grandpa???

Stay with this -- the answer is at the end. It may surprise you.

One evening a grandson was talking to his grandfather about current events. The grandson asked his grandfather what he thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general.

The Grandfather replied, 'Well, let me think a minute, I was born before:

 television

 penicillin

 polio shots

 frozen foods

 Xerox

 contact lenses

 Frisbees and

 the pill

There were no:

credit cards

 laser beams or

 ball-point pens

Man had not invented:

panty hose

 air conditioners

 dishwashers

 clothes dryers

 and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air and

 man hadn't yet walked on the moon

Your Grandmother and I got married first, . . . and then lived together.

Every family had a father and a mother.

Until I was 25, I called every man older than me, 'Sir'.

And after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, 'Sir.'

We were before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, day-care centers, and group therapy.

Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense..

We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions.

Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege.

We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent.

Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.

Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started.

Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends-not purchasing condominiums.

We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.

We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios.

And I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey.

If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan' on it, it was junk

The term 'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam.

Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of.

We had 5 &10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents.

Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel.

And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards.

You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600, . . but who could afford one?

Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon.

In my day:

 'grass' was mowed,

 'coke' was a cold drink,

 'pot' was something your mother cooked in and

 'rock music' was your grandmother's lullaby.

 'Aids' were helpers in the Principal's office,

 'chip' meant a piece of wood,

 'hardware' was found in a hardware store and

 'software' wasn't even a word.

And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby. No wonder people call us 'old and confused' and say there is a generation gap... and how old do you think I am?

I bet you have this old man in mind... you are in for a shock!

Read on to see -- pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at the same time..

Are you ready ??

This man would be only 64 years old.

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That's me ! - I am that Gran'pa Alan. :)

I can also remember when the teacher asked you why you were not in school yesterday you just came right out and said: -

- "Sorry Miss, I had the Sh**s".

Now the kids of today have got to say that they had.... - "Irritable Bowel Syndrome."

These are not good, or any better times for the "Tell it how it is" generation that I came from.

Old-fashioned manners seem to have no place in our modern society.

I said "Good morning Sir" to someone in our local shop the other morning, - and this great big hairy assed lesbian smacked me right in the mouth.

Good manners wasted on modern society sure enough ! :(

John. (Tellin' it like it is. :dance: )

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That's me ! - I am that Gran'pa Alan. :)

I can also remember when the teacher asked you why you were not in school yesterday you just came right out and said: -

- "Sorry Miss, I had the Sh**s".

Now the kids of today have got to say that they had.... - "Irritable Bowel Syndrome."

These are not good, or any better times for the "Tell it how it is" generation that I came from.

Old-fashioned manners seem to have no place in our modern society.

I said "Good morning Sir" to someone in our local shop the other morning, - and this great big hairy assed lesbian smacked me right in the mouth.

Good manners wasted on modern society sure enough ! :(

John. (Tellin' it like it is. :dance: )

You always have to go just that bit over the top, don't you!

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You always have to go just that bit over the top, don't you!Cuss.gif

"As the old lady said to the vicar when he accidentally knocked her dentures out."

Aaah ! So you were the visitor to "The Lizard" last year who made a complaint about what the Bull was doing to the Cows in that field just before Kynance Garage. :lol: :lol:

Jus' - Tellin' it like it is. :lol:

They wont print my replies in "Womans Realm" or "Knitting Weekly" anymore you know ?

One woman there reckoned I was winding her up on purpose. hug.gif

The truth is out there. - Anybody got the URL?

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We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.

I wonder what country that is that didn't have yogurt 64 years ago...?

I can't remember yogurt as a child and it wasn't 64 years ago, the rest seams about right

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You always have to go just that bit over the top, don't you!Cuss.gif

"As the old lady said to the vicar when he accidentally knocked her dentures out."

Aaah ! So you were the visitor to "The Lizard" last year who made a complaint about what the Bull was doing to the Cows in that field just before Kynance Garage. :lol: :lol:

Jus' - Tellin' it like it is. :lol:

They wont print my replies in "Womans Realm" or "Knitting Weekly" anymore you know ?

One woman there reckoned I was winding her up on purpose. hug.gif

The truth is out there. - Anybody got the URL?

I pressed that button again................. :P

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We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.

I wonder what country that is that didn't have yogurt 64 years ago...?

Yogurt (also known as yoghurt, yaourt, yoghurd, and yogourt) has been a food staple in the Middle East for millenia, but it did not become a mainstay in the United States until the latter part of the 19th century. The Dannon company achieved some minor success in 1947 when it first mixed strawberry preserves into yogurt and offered it as a sweetened dessert. (64 years ago)

However, it was health guru Gayelord Hauser who pushed yogurt into the limelight when he proclaimed it a wonder food in his book "Look Younger, Live Longer," published in 1950. Sales of yogurt soon skyrocketed, increasing production 500% by 1968.

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