T'was the night before Xmas

[AlanHo]

SCROLL DOWN TO POST No 18 FOR FULL COMPILATION

T’was the night before Xmas – the forum was free

The board was deserted – not a poster to see

No threads were appearing – and here is the rub

It seems all the members were down at our pub

Alanho is the landlord – Artist the barmaid

Keeping the peace when tempers get frayed

With andsome tanked up and stirring the pot

Cuz a socialist said he likes Gordon a lot

Pops sits in the corner – keeping the peace

As back-up for staff – it gives them release

Some rude youngsters conspire to get andsome quite mad

He tells them they’re lucky he isn't their dad

A popular drinker was a guy called Acronis

Whose true image gave him the lure of Adonis

A guy called Norton was a regular before

But he buggered things up and was thrown out the door

Catgate comes in – and tells one of his fables

About grannie Cummugeon and her marzipan tables

It’s all convoluted – for some hard to follow

But the gullible amongst us find it easy to swallow

Tankus sits there – very quiet at the bar

Sipping real ale, from a large pewter jar

Innit the case – after 8 pints and a half

He slides to the floor and mutters “Arf Arf”

Doug jogs through the door – he’s been out training

But he’s all sopping wet because it’s been raining

He’s getting ready for the North Run next year

His times are improving – so we served him a beer

Gadalph’s sitting there in his kilt and his sporran

With legs splayed apart – he looks very foreign

Irene and Pushkin will visibly wilt

If they spot what is lurking there under his kilt

Pat Willener flew in – the inscrutable man

To try our pub food – he chose sushi flan

Washed down with sake and plenty of beer

We trust his report will bring us good cheer

Panarchy asked “What ale do you suggest”

So Artist replied “This beer is the best”

But being contrary – he don’t follow advice

And chose something else – which wasn’t too nice

Nellie came in – asked to visit the kitchen

To check for malware that might set people itching

But we were quite lucky – she found nothing wrong

Came into the bar and sang us a song

The bar was so crowded – we’re not able to mention

All members there – so it’s not our intention

To leave people out, for better or worse

So if your name is omitted – add your own bloody verse..........

[doug]

How on earth can anyone possibly add to that? Will you let us into your secret as to how and where you dream these things up?

[Watchful]

I was quite disappointed not to see little Pushkin

She of the blonde hair and English rose skin

I know for a fact she's very good at singing

So if she don't get invited she'll leave your ears ringing

[doug]

Keep em coming folks see if they will last out 'till Xmas.

[Watchful]

Oops! just spotted I am there after all......gawping up Gandalf's kilt. Great :D I love a kilt.

[AlanHo]

Oops! just spotted I am there after all......gawping up Gandalf's kilt. Great :D I love a kilt.

Shame on you - mucky madam.... :lol:

[Watchful]

It's the Scottish side coming out ;)

[catgate]

I know Solihull is not too far away from Stratford upon Avon. Do you commune with the spirit of the bard, Alan.

I reckon an A level in Alanho would be a thing worth studying for.

[deuces wild]

You forgot me!!! You forgot Irene!

[doug]

Irene was there dressed up as a fairy.

She said "like my new Avatar folks,"

But her wings were all fluffy and hairy.

DW was in a corner just stamping his feet,

"Be careful out there folks the rains just turned to sleet!"

[AlanHo]

You forgot me!!! You forgot Irene!

I didn't forget you - but you are too far away to get to our pub. I didn't forget Irene though - read it again, and again, and again.....

But here goes - you asked for it.... :lol:

Dueces Wild from America came over here

Especially to sample some strong British beer

He's more used to drinking American ale

Which is rather like cats pee - all watery and pale.

[doug]

You cant miss him, he's over in the far corner just stamping his feet.

[Irene]

Gadalph’s sitting there in his kilt and his sporran

With legs splayed apart – he looks very foreign

Irene and Pushkin will visibly wilt

If they spot what is lurking there under his kilt

:0 ... Chance would be a fine thing! ;)

deuces wild ...You forgot me!!! You forgot Irene!

Oh no DW, I got to look up Gandalph's kilt. ...

I'm telling nothing.

[AlanHo]

Boris sits quietly - unobtrusive but there

Providing support with his usual care

His profile says clearly - 99's his right age

Which with all his knowledge - makes him quite a sage

Irene is fickle - keeps on changing her sig

They vary in style - some are small some are big

Today's is a dolphin jumping over a seal

I wonder what tomorrow's posts will reveal

[deuces wild]

Gadalph's sitting there in his kilt and his sporran

With legs splayed apart – he looks very foreign

Irene and Pushkin will visibly wilt

If they spot what is lurking there under his kilt

:0 ... Chance would be a fine thing! ;)

deuces wild ...You forgot me!!! You forgot Irene!

Oh no DW, I got to look up Gandalph's kilt. ...

I'm telling nothing.

:lol: :lol:

Sorry for missing that Alan!

[AlanHo]

I know Solihull is not too far away from Stratford upon Avon. Do you commune with the spirit of the bard, Alan.

I have been known to have a glass or three of mead....hic.......

[trackrat]

Brilliant Alan, keep them coming.

[AlanHo]

COMPILATION OF ALL POSTS

T’was the night before Xmas – the forum was free

The board was deserted – not a poster to see

No threads were appearing – and here is the rub

It seems all the members were down at our pub

Alanho is the landlord – Artist the barmaid

Keeping the peace when tempers get frayed

With andsome tanked up and stirring the pot

Cuz a socialist said he likes Gordon a lot

Pops sits in the corner – keeping the peace

As back-up for staff – it gives them release

Some rude youngsters conspire to get andsome quite mad

He tells them they’re lucky he isn't their dad

A popular drinker was a guy called Acronis

Whose true image gave him the lure of Adonis

A guy called Norton was a regular before

But he buggered things up and was thrown out the door

Catgate comes in – and tells one of his fables

About grannie Cummugeon and her marzipan tables

It’s all convoluted – for some hard to follow

But the gullible amongst us find it easy to swallow

Tankus sits there – very quiet at the bar

Sipping real ale, from a large pewter jar

Innit the case – after 8 pints and a half

He slides to the floor and mutters “Arf Arf”

Boris sits quietly - unobtrusive but there

Providing support with his usual care

His profile says clearly - 99's his right age

Which with all his knowledge - makes him quite a sage

Doug jogs through the door – he’s been out training

But he’s all sopping wet because it’s been raining

He’s getting ready for the North Run next year

His times are improving – so we served him a beer

Gadalph’s sitting there in his kilt and his sporran

With legs splayed apart – he looks very foreign

Irene and Pushkin will visibly wilt

If they spot what is lurking there under his kilt

If you ladies keep looking up inside the kilt

To see just how gruesome he is built

You'll discover - as you've ne're before

Such flirting will cause it to gruesome more.

Pat Willener flew in – the inscrutable man

To try our pub food – he chose sushi flan

Washed down with sake and plenty of beer

We trust his report will bring us good cheer

Panarchy asked “What ale do you suggest”

So Artist replied “This beer is the best”

But being contrary – he don’t follow advice

And chose something else – which wasn’t too nice

Nellie came in – asked to visit the kitchen

To check for malware that might set people itching

But we were quite lucky – she found nothing wrong

Came into the bar and sang us a song

Dueces Wild from America came over here

Especially to sample some strong British beer

He's more used to drinking American ale

Which is rather like cats pee - all watery and pale

He arrived at the pub whilst the bar was all quiet

He started on andsome and near caused a riot

The political chat got well out of hand

The buggers involved deserve to be banned

It didn't take long for the usual crowd

To enter the fray and start shouting out loud

The leader was andsome "What a load of old crap

The US are barmy - George Bush needs a slap"

DW was incensed - he had a blood rush

The way they were talking about his hero George Bush

"UK as an ally - should do as they're told

And help the US - as more wars we unfold

You guys on the forum are ignorant codgers

Iv'e had quite enough of you old coffin dodgers"

Oi - yelled the barmaid, show some respect

What you lot are saying just isn't correct

They huffed and they puffed, they did shout and did bellow

But the effects of the beer soon made them all mellow

They found common ground to have a good moan

The French were the bad guys before they went home.

The bar was so crowded – we’re not able to mention

All members there – so it’s not our intention

To leave people out, for better or worse

So if your name is omitted – add your own bloody verse..........

[artist]

I was quite disappointed not to see little Pushkin

She of the blonde hair and English rose skin

I know for a fact she's very good at singing

So if she don't get invited she'll leave your ears ringing

Well done! You tell 'em!

[Watchful]

Excellent Alan! The updated version is far superior ;)

[andsome]

ABSOBLOODYLUTELYMOREBRILLIANTTHANANYTHINGONHEREBEFORE. Only one tine problem Alan. Why didn't you put a new ink cartridge in before starting the thread? :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

P.S. Well done everyone else who contributed. I wish I was poetic, but I suppose I shouldn't be greedy, after all I do have my good looks.

[AlanHo]

Excellent Alan! The updated version is far superior ;)

Thank you for the compliment

I could do with more of that

To look better in your latest post

You should wear a smaller hat

[AlanHo]

ABSOBLOODYLUTELYMOREBRILLIANTTHANANYTHINGONHEREBEFORE. Only one tine problem Alan. Why didn't you put a new ink cartridge in before starting the thread? :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

P.S. Well done everyone else who contributed. I wish I was poetic, but I suppose I shouldn't be greedy, after all I do have my good looks.

Andsomes not poetic

He relies on his appearance

And a brain as big as a planet

And his stubborn perseverence.

You'd think someone so clever

Could compile a little verse

But never mind - it's OK

There's lots of things that's worse

We've all got our weaknesses

Mine are wine and women

And other things to keep me fit

Like good food, golf and swimming.

[Watchful]

I take my hat off to your skills

Your way with words and rhyme

'Tis well known it's the pen that kills

And damages more in time.

But you have a sparkling wit,

Knowing just how far to go;

With a fluent pen and using it

To delight us daily; AlanHo.

[andsome]

I know a few dirty rhymes, but they're not my own. :lol: