artist Posted April 16, 2004 Report Share Posted April 16, 2004 1. Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.2. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.3. Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.4. Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.5. Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.6. Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.7. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
christmascracker Posted April 16, 2004 Report Share Posted April 16, 2004 Very true, especially no 7 :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nellie2 Posted April 16, 2004 Report Share Posted April 16, 2004 :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Besty Posted April 16, 2004 Report Share Posted April 16, 2004 I bet that wouldnt be considered sexist Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nellie2 Posted April 16, 2004 Report Share Posted April 16, 2004 Nope.... not in the least!! :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
popeye Posted April 16, 2004 Report Share Posted April 16, 2004 Bitch. :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nellie2 Posted April 16, 2004 Report Share Posted April 16, 2004 :o Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andsome Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 What a load of old cods-wallop Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artist Posted April 17, 2004 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 Bitch. :blink:Don't you call my friend that!!! :angry: :lol: :lol: :lol: (takes one to know one, Popeye!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madboy33 Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 what the Women overheat in bed, not menwomen also snore, thats a fact.............LOLwomen love to prepare the food Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ranger Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 Rules men wished woman knew1. If you think you might be fat, you are. Don't ask us. Just get your fat arse in a gym.2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put the f*cker down.3. Don't cut your hair. Ever. It causes arguments when we comment on it.4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present.......again!5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.6. Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.7. Anyone can buy condoms.8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like every other cat.9. Dogs are better than ANY cats.10. Sunday = Football/Rugby/Any other sport. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.11. Shopping is not a sport.12. Anything you wear is fine. Really.13. You have enough clothes.14. You have too many shoes.15. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.16. Your brother is an idiot, your ex-boyfriend is a twat and your Dad probably is too.17. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.18. No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.19. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than pissing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.20. Most blokes own two to three pairs of shoes, what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, that would look good with your dress?21. Yes, No and Mmm are perfectly acceptable answers.22. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. Now.23. Your Mum doesn't have to be our best friend.24. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.25. Check your oil. It is an essential part of the car.26. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out.27. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.28. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.29. Telling us that the models in the men's magazines are airbrushed makes you look jealous and petty and it's certainly not going to deter us from reading the magazines.30. The male models with the great bodies you see in magazines are all gay. Face it.31. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.32. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?33. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.34. Consider Sport a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just like you do.35. Women wearing Wonderbras, low-cut blouses, tight tops, no jackets, chest level logo'd t-shirts etc. etc. lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.36. When we are in bed and look tired this means that we are tired and does not mean that we want to discuss the relationship.37. If you want some dessert after a meal - order some. You don't have to finish it. You can just taste it if you like but don't say "No, I couldn't/shouldn't/don't want any" and then eat half of mine.38. Dieting doesn't work without exercise.39. If you're on a diet it doesn't mean my meals should be rabbit-food nouvelle-cuisine style. A man's four essential food groups are: white meat, red meat, cold beer and more cold beer. Please ensure all meals contain a good balance of the above in good quantities - everything else falls under the category 'garnish'.40. Do not question our sense of direction. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sir Radfordin Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 ranger - never have I read so much truth. Thats the kind of teaching the government should be pushing in our schools :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mark2 Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 And rule 41You can tell us you want something done or how you want it done, not both Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nellie2 Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 I was feeling sorry for ranger.... now I have decided he needs a good SMACK!Artist, don't worry about Popeye.... we have an understanding!! :) Mark2......... why on earth not??? :huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drovers Dog Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 :P I consider that this Tread is Discriminating against people!!!But what the Hell, looks about even to me!!!Always Remember, what you say in jest, comes back to you in the Bedroom!! :censored: :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tankus Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 this (rangers post) should be read out with the bans Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andsome Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like every other cat.9. Dogs are better than ANY cats.I am not going to argue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkey Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 well said ranger :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artist Posted April 17, 2004 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 Just can't take it chaps - HAVE to put in your own twopennyworth!! :lol: :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sir Radfordin Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 Just can't take it chaps - HAVE to put in your own twopennyworth!! :lol:Â :lol:Proving the point that the woman will always win the argument, anything he says after is the start of a new one :rolleyes: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gandalph Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 Just can't take it chaps - HAVE to put in your own twopennyworth!! :lol:Â :lol:Women, they just have to have the last word. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
christmascracker Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 Women, they just have to have the last word. :lol:Very true :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Besty Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 Every single time they think they are never wrong Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nellie2 Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 We're not :huh: Whatever made you think we could possibly be wrong about anything!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Besty Posted April 17, 2004 Report Share Posted April 17, 2004 That is the very thing i am talkin about Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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